Life is an adventure of navigating through the highs and lows and creating a firm balance through the pressure of each phase. Our ability to find the right path despite the pain and discomfort highlights happiness, peace, and joy and so many of us struggle to get the right life map.
We struggle to pass through the cracks in preparation for the light, we struggle to embrace the change accompanied by every shift and in this lies true happiness.
I know it can be quite challenging to find that balance especially in the heated season where the struggle through the chaos leaves you with many deep questions like what truly is happiness? How can I be happy with myself despite everything I am going through? How can I be happy alone when my self-worth is deflated? How can I always be happy and what exactly is the theory of happiness?
It can be really challenging to find these answers and get the right direction when hit with a big cloak of reality. The idea of finding happiness becomes difficult but I am here to unravel this.
So how exactly do you find happiness in every situation you find yourself in? This question crossed my mind a few days back when I saw a quote on Instagram that read “Happiness is letting go of what you think your life is supposed to look like” and immediately got the inspiration to write this post. I have always held the belief that happiness isn’t necessarily living a fancy life or spending a lot of money.
In fact, it goes way beyond that. For me, happiness is a state of mind – an interpretation of the way you look at things. It’s quite sad how many people have the wrong notion of what happiness is.
If you think happiness is only experienced when you spend lavishly and live a life of glitz and glamour, you definitely need to have a rethink! I mean, there are thousands of people out there today, who barely have enough money to take care of themselves, yet, are genuinely happy.
I picture life as a room illuminated by a self-controlled bulb that lights up with different colors per time; whatever you decide to make of the color at your disposal, is your choice and reality. In other words, as we go through various phases of our lives, life inevitably throws at us, various circumstances and how we choose to handle them is our choice.
They say when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade! Life will always give you lemons, you make of the lemons whatever you will. Looking back at how far I have come and how I have been able to pull through, I can boldly say that happiness is a thing of the mind. I have had really rough times.
There were days when I literally wanted to scream and rant for hours about how haggard my life was. I mean, I had a whole lot going on but almost everyone who knew me believed I was completely fine. What they did not know was that I was not as radiant as I was outside, inside. I was rotting away with a lot of problems inside me.
How did I manage to stay happy? How did I convert the negativity that life threw at me into positivity? How did I find happiness? I’ll try to break it down in this article and I sincerely hope these tips would beam a ray of hope into someone’s terrible situation out there.
It doesn’t matter if your partner just broke your heart or you just got laid off work for no justifiable reason; whatever the situation is, one thing is certain, you can always drink from the river of happiness. Happiness is free but only to those who make deliberate efforts to enjoy it.
Don’t be so quick to conclude that all is lost. You can still enjoy the fruits of happiness. As a matter of fact, in my experience, I have come to realize that success really follows happiness and not the other way around. When we really enjoy the beauty of being happy, life has no choice than to work in our favor.
Now let’s talk about How to Find Happiness in Every Situation
Finding happiness in every situation is more of a habit than a one-time thing. You don’t just find happiness, you make it a habit and with time, it becomes a mindset that eventually sticks with you every time you are faced with challenging circumstances.
Happiness isn’t a theory and here are a few suggested ways you can ensure that you always find happiness in every situation.
1. Surround Yourself With Positive People
The first step is to filter the people that you surround yourself with. Truth is, the people around you play a major role in shaping the kind of person that you are. They play vital roles in influencing how you interpret the situations you are in.
If you are only surrounded by people who constantly submerge you in the pool of negativity, you are most likely never to find happiness at all. Look around you, what does the mindset of the people you are close to look like?
Negative people will never make you see reasons to be happy, especially in sad situations. They will feed on the sadness in the air and give you more reasons why you should never see positivity. It is only when you are surrounded by people who encourage you and make you see the brighter side of things that you can truly know how to be happy always.
A few years back, when I was in college, I had a friend who would always make me laugh when I had a bad day – I often did. He was such a lighthearted fellow. He would make me laugh with zero efforts. Over time, I saw him as someone I could talk to when I was having a bad day and with time, his aura of positivity started to rub off on me.
One day, out of genuine curiosity, I asked him if he ever had bad days. His response: “Well, I can’t say I don’t have bad days. Of course, I do! But I have realized that there is no point dwelling on the few bad things that happen to me when there are over a hundred things to be happy about.” I was astounded by his response.
He never came off as someone who had ever experienced sadness and that taught me a great lesson. No matter how bad your situation is, there is always a reason to be happy.
Well, we became close friends before graduating and frankly, that was one of the best decisions I ever made in my college days. This is also one of the best ways to learn how to be happy alone.
2. Be Deliberate About It
Being happy in times of pain is never an easy thing to do but with determination, you can. Just like my friend, build a mindset that is naturally configured to look at the brighter sides of the bad situations you are in.
There are many things to be happy and grateful for, so why be sad? Now, I am not saying that it is wrong to be unhappy or sad. Of course, it is! Sadness and unhappiness are just normal emotions that humans generally go through. You are not supposed to avoid your emotions.
However, you can decide if you want to keep being sad or just make up your mind to be happy and forge ahead with other things in your life. No matter what life throws at you, you will always have that choice to make. Be intentional about wanting to be happy. In learning how to be happy by being deliberate about it, you’d also learn how to be happy alone in life.
3. Accept That You Can’t Control Everything And Move On
Having this mindset already solves half the problem making you unhappy. You should develop that honest mindset that readily admits that some things are really beyond your controls and you can only but accept that they are a part of your reality and move on. Trust me, this makes things way easier.
We are humans and our capabilities are limited. I realized this a few years ago when things weren’t all rosy for me. It’s best to considerably reduce your expectations from people. Learning how to be happy alone in life is basically accepting the fact that people will always disappoint you.
But if you already have a mindset that allows you to accept the things you can’t control and move on; things would definitely be easier. I have imbibed this habit in everything I do and it works perfectly well for me. Want to find happiness in everything you do? Start accepting the fact that you can’t control certain things today.
4. Accept And Love Yourself Unconditionally
You are enough to make yourself happy. You do not need the validation of anyone to be happy. You need to accept the fact that your happiness is hugely linked to your mindset. You are good enough and the more you remind yourself of this, the easier it becomes to see the reasons why you should be happy.
Everyone has flaws and you might be the reason you are in the sad situation you are in at the moment, but that’s okay. You don’t have to continue dwelling in the mud of your inadequacies. Pick yourself up, dust off the past and accept your flaws deliberately and move on.
A lot becomes easier when we accept and love ourselves unconditionally. This is another effective way to learn how to be happy alone in life.
5. Laugh A Lot And Always Lighten Up
Don’t take yourself too seriously. Have fun. Don’t be a bore. Life has a whole lot to offer if only we would open up our minds to receive its goodies. No matter what you are going through, there is a reason to smile hidden in that mess. Look out for it and smile.
Tell jokes. Reassure yourself that whatever you are going through would only last for a while. Enjoy yourself while you can. Always engage yourself with whatever makes you happy. Trust me, smiling and laughing is one of the simple things that make you happy.
6. Realize That There Is Only One Person Who Can Make You Happy And That Is You
This is nothing but the absolute truth. In learning how to find happiness, you are the only one capable of making yourself experience true and genuine happiness. No one is going to do that for you. No matter what you are going through, you owe yourself that responsibility.
Like I said earlier, happiness is a mindset and when you decide to be happy despite all the odds surrounding you, you will definitely enjoy the beauty of happiness. And even when unpleasant events hit you out of the blues, realizing that you are the only one person who can make yourself find true happiness is one of the ways you can learn how to make yourself happy again.
7. Shun Hatred And Revenge, It’s Like Drinking Poison And Expecting The Other Person To Die
Being a happy person is definitely not a product of hoarding fruits of hatred, revenge, and bitterness in the annals of your heart. Do away with those.
If you are truly interested in knowing how to live a happier life, then you would definitely need to know how to shun hatred and all other forms of mental burdens. People will always disappoint and betray you and the earlier you realize that, the better for you.
Holding grudges, hatred, bitterness and the venom of revenge would only hinder your happiness. It’s like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. Really, what you are doing to yourself is harm and the moment you realize that, you’ll start seeing a change in the way you view life.
Keeping hatred in your mind is definitely not one of the ways to learn how to be happy alone in life.
8. Be Content With What You Have
In learning to find happiness in every situation, it is important to be content with what you have. One of the main causes of unhappiness is the feeling of inadequacy.
In other words, the moment you start feeling threatened by the possession of others, you have begun the process of setting yourself up for unhappiness. People will always be ahead of you. People will always get to that height you are looking to get to before you. You need to stop comparing your growth with the growth of others. You are moving at your pace.
9. Let The Past Be The Past
Your past is your past and nothing more. If you get stuck in the negativities of the past, you are definitely setting yourself up for grand unhappiness. Let the past be in the past. You might have made mistakes in the past, you can only learn from them. Do not let the past trap you in the world of unhappiness. Leave the past in the past and watch how you speedily learn how to be happy alone.
So, there you have it. A few tips on how to find happiness in whatever situation you are in. You will always be alone for most of your life, so you need to know how to be happy alone in life.
I do hope that this post inspires someone out there and helps them get you up and running again. If you would like to suggest other ways of finding happiness, feel free to leave comments in the comment section. I definitely will be reading…
Hey! Thanks for reading up to this point. I really hope you’re inspired and changed with the tips. Life won’t always give you the beautiful things in its possession, you know? But then, you can decide to enjoy happiness despite trying times. I hope you genuinely find reasons to be happy alone with yourself again.
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