It is essential to understand how to be more outgoing and confident in a world where most interactions have become virtual and people have decided to hide behind their doors daily.
Building physical connections with people while being outspoken and taking a stance on whatever you feel is a great way to live and develop healthy social relationships.
This way, you do not have to cower at the thought of speaking your mind when need be. Instead, you can stand your ground on your opinions and confidently disagree or agree with the views of others.
If you struggle with self-confidence in any way, these steps on how to be more outgoing would be a great hack for you as you navigate your relationships.
How To Be More Outgoing And Confident – 12 Ways
Here are 12 ways how to be more outgoing:
1. Maintain Eye Contact
It is easier to look towards the floor and other places except for the eyes of the person speaking to you. Maintaining eye contact is not always easy; it could be awkward, especially when you have not created any bond with the other person.
Eye contact is used for nonverbal communication and can be used to express certain emotions as well. While learning how to be more outgoing, you must learn to maintain eye contact with people as you speak.
Not only does this help you be more self-aware, but it makes you recall all that the other person has said. While this is important for personal relationships, it also matters at work.
Colleagues and leaders will be more inclined to build relationships with you when you look them in the eye.
On the other hand, no eye contact can show a lack of confidence.
To maintain eye contact, you can learn to make eye contact before talking with others. You can also hold up the person’s gaze for 4-5 seconds and look to the side when you break eye contact.
This way, you avoid looking at the floor and appearing shy. You can also use gestures and move your eyes slowly, as looking away too quickly might make you seem nervous.
There is also the part of the 40/60 rule which states that you should maintain eye contact 40%-60% of the time during the conversation.
Specifically, if you are looking for how to be more outgoing as an introvert, the 40/60 rule would be the absolute hack for you.
2. Learn To Start Conversations With Strangers
You will encounter strangers who might even become friends in life’s dealings. However, knowing how to begin a conversation with a stranger is essential before advancing into friendship. After all, communication is vital in every relationship, right?
First, you need to begin the conversation with a positive attitude, don’t come off defensive unless there is a need for that. Let your body language look enthusiastic, and smile or maintain eye contact.
You can also take a series of deep breaths to calm down and help you relieve nervousness. If you are thinking of being more outgoing with strangers, one great way to start would be to ask them questions or a series of questions.
For example, you can speak about the weather, their outfit, or even shared responsibility if you wonder how to be more outgoing at work.
You could also start by complimenting their hair or outfit and proceed with a follow-up question to ask them where they got it from or who made it for them. Also, you should be more straightforward and go right ahead to introduce yourself.
It is more than likely that the person will also say their name, and you can strike up a casual conversation from there. If you see a stranger struggling with a task, you can also offer to help them.
You can also ask their opinion or seek advice on a particular issue. More than offering your help, you can also ask for help depending on the circumstances you would have at the time.
When you are unsure of what to do, you can go right ahead to point out a shared trait or activity you have with the other person.
3. Join Groups
Now that you have learnt how to speak to strangers, the next step would be how to be more outgoing in a group.
This stranger most likely has a group of friends, and you may find it awkward being in their midst if you do not navigate how to be more outgoing without being annoying. People tend to respond well to those who show genuine interest in them.
Being a good listener, asking follow-up questions, and delving into people’s interests is a great way to join a group. Also, people may not always remember what you say to them, but they usually remember how you make them feel.
The best way to make a good impression in a group is to have feel-good conversations. You can try humour, compliment them, or discuss things they enjoy talking about. Expect positive outcomes; they will like you and want you to be there.
Asides from friendship groups, you can also join groups geared towards an activity or cause, like dance groups, volunteer groups, clubs, etc.
You must be close to them regularly; this will signal that you are interested in being part of the group and are more likely to be included in their plans and conversations.
4. Visit Public Spaces More Often
When navigating how to be more outgoing and social, one of the top suggestions would be to visit public spaces more often. This will put you in a space with people around to interact with.
Firstly, you should outline public places you like to visit. For example, if you love good food, you would consider going to a restaurant or a steakhouse.
On the other hand, if you know more about the ambience and cool scenery, you can visit a museum, park or aquarium. On the other hand, if you love music or a good laugh, you can go to a jazz house or a stand-up comedy night event.
If you love movies, the cinema would be your go-to place. One thing all these places have in common is people; if you are considering how to be more outgoing, you need to interact with more people.
Putting yourself in the public space will attract more people and even get them to reach out to you first! It is okay if you have to plan for this outing.
You can take some time to plan your itinerary for the day, select your outfits or get new ones if necessary. Consider doing things that make you happy and excited before that day so you are in high spirits before the day comes.
If possible, you can go to check out the place you want to visit. If you need to make any bookings or get a ticket beforehand, you should do so on time to avoid any delays on that day.
Finally, on that day, maintain a positive mindset and resist the urge to focus only on the fact that it is a public space. Think of the connections you would make there and the great people you would meet.
Think of the compliments you would receive from strangers and the lovely time you would have. Let your mind be focused on the fantastic time you will have that day. This step is vital if you’re wondering how to be more outgoing and fun at the same time.
5. Don’t Say No To Invitations
If you have been thinking of how to be more outgoing and confident, accepting invitations would be a good step to achieving that.
The new friends you have made from the previous actions could invite you to some events or gatherings, and it would be a nice gesture to accept their invitation.
This way, they are certain that you have similar interests with them and that you care about the things that concern them because in as much as you have a goal with working on yourself, they are still actual people with interests too.
Of course, you do not necessarily need to accept an invitation to something, or somewhere you are uncomfortable with. For instance, if you have a phobia for animals, you might not be eager to accept an invitation for such an outing.
However, you should not turn down the invitation when the outing is something you are interested in and comfortable with.
6. Do Small Talk
One helpful skill for being more outgoing is comfortably engaging in small talk. You can start the small talk by initiating a greeting to the other person or the persons in a group.
If you have never met the person, you can introduce yourself by your name. You might also want to reintroduce yourself to someone you’ve met before, just in case your name skipped their mind.
Do your best to remember the name of your conversation partner. This shows that you recognize them and are interested in what they say.
If you’re bothered about how to be more outgoing without being annoying, you should keep the conversation light and positive. Lightening your small conversation will make them relaxed, comfortable, and enjoy the interaction.
Remember that small talk is usually not the best time to instruct someone or talk about something serious. Also, try avoiding sensitive topics. Keep your subject appropriate by avoiding topics about politics, religion, and controversies.
These topics may make your small talk partner uncomfortable or lead to lengthy discussions and heated conversations. Casual conversation is not meant for rants. If you do, you will appear as if you are hard to please or mean.
Meanwhile, being careful of what you say makes you appear thoughtful. Instead, discuss general interest subjects like food, travel, hobbies, weather, sport, movies, and books.
Choosing these subjects shows that you are approachable, friendly, engaging and someone who enjoys life.
7. Ask Questions
A person who knows how to be more outgoing and social knows it is essential to make the person they speak with talk about themselves.
They understand that it’s not just about them. Ask open-ended questions that would offer them an opportunity to give several answers. Questions like “What do you think about the weather?” “How has your day been?” are open-ended questions.
If you ask close-ended questions like “Do you like the weather?” “Do you work here?” the only answer they could give is either yes or no, which would give you a hard time, especially if your major concern is how to be more outgoing as an introvert.
When you start talking or asking questions about a topic, gauge if it’s interesting enough to your speaking partner and observe the conversation flow. Also, conversations end when people do not come off as sincere or interested enough.
Asking follow-up questions shows that you care to know more about the person concerning the conversation.
You can set up a strategy involving asking open-ended questions, asking follow-up questions and sharing something about yourself that is relatable and know how to be more outgoing.
You would create a balance between sharing your details and asking questions. You can ask questions about the present, the near future and the mid or long-term future. However, avoid asking too many questions in a row, as it is a conversation, not an interview.
8. Join Group Conversations And Make Contributions
In the groups you belong to or the ones you desire to join, you must join their discussions and contribute where necessary. For instance, if you are part of a school club, you have to converse with others and contribute to the project.
You may now wonder how to be more outgoing at school. Researching before the group meets for the general discussion will give you an edge to start a conversation and contribute to the discussions.
You do not need to have all the answers to every question since it is group work, the aim is to make your contributions, and you only do that effectively when you have learnt how to be more outgoing.
9. Go Out With Like-minded People
This has to be the most essential step in how to be more outgoing. If you sat in a room with people with the same views on certain issues, who had similar interests to yours and were willing to engage in conversations, it would be 10x easier to be more confident.
Starting up a conversation through questions would flow as the ideas are similar, and they would not hold back their responses from you. It’s one-way access; you would not need to break a sweat.
Also, if you go to a public place with like-minded people, there’s a higher chance of settling in that new environment. There are no moments where you zone out or take occasional breath breaks to calm your nerves.
You are comfortable and better involved with the activities around you, and there’s no grey area. For the record, if you want to know how to be more outgoing, try going out to public spaces more often with like-minded people before you try going alone.
This way, you are used to these places and can navigate your way as an individual.
10. Volunteer
Volunteering is a great way to get involved in a group or community; it is an excellent idea if you’re wondering how to be more outgoing. It allows you to interact with people on a level playing ground with others as there is one cause in mind.
Not only do you learn how to be more outgoing, but you provide assistance and get involved with effecting a change in society. You save Nonprofit organizations money they would have spent paying employees for other vital things.
The incredible part of volunteering is that you do not need to have a vast knowledge of volunteering; you can learn on the job. You meet with the locals in the community and support families or individuals who cannot support themselves.
To begin volunteering, the first thing would be to find a volunteer community or a nonprofit organization looking for volunteers. You can do your search on animal shelters, libraries, retirement homes, etc.
11. Prepare For Possible Questions
Understand the kind of people you’d meet and what appeals to them. Thankfully, with the advancement of technology, you can easily search for certain keywords online, so there’s no blank moment of not knowing what and how to respond.
You can practice likely questions you might get asked before your mirror; look firm and be confident in your speech.
Even if you are caught unawares by a question, and there’s a tendency to appear thrown off balance, you could confidently let the other person know that you are not certain of an answer and will get back when you have the correct answer.
This way, you show that you have mastered how to be more outgoing by answering confidently and showing interest in that conversation. You don’t need to answer a question you are not comfortable with.
If a question on more personal issues or any other issue you would rather be silent on comes up in discussion, you can politely decline to speak on it and even introduce a new topic of discussion.
12. Say Hi To People You Know
Reaching out first is a great sign that you have hacked how to be more outgoing. It takes some level of confidence to bring a person’s attention to you when you see them.
If you see your friends on the way to school or the park, you should contact them if they do not see you first. Draw their attention to yourself and start a conversation if they have the time.
For strangers you have only met once or twice, reaching out to them when you come across them is a great way to keep your memory fresh in their minds and is a pointer to the fact that you enjoyed the last conversation you had with them.
Next time, they will most likely reach out to you when they see you down the hallway, at the park, at work or in school.
For a person who only speaks to those they know, saying hi to people first when you come across them is a good step on how to be more outgoing and social.
There is no harm if you reach out first, contrary to the opinion that you should wait for people to reach out to you first. Although relationships and conversations generally are two-way streets, there’s a part of reaching out and receiving feedback.
You might never get feedback from the person on your last conversation if you do not reach out. You can also give the answers to questions you had no answers to from the previous discussion. Indeed, it all begins with “hi”.
Conclusion
Discovering how to be more outgoing is essential to being social and building self-confidence. Being in this digital age, it is easy to decide not to put yourself out there and not be open to building connections.
However, it is good to go off your devices for a while and opt for physical conversations that require you to speak and hold actual conversations with people. Even if you are thinking of how to be more outgoing and talkative, following these steps will help you a great deal.
When you join groups, visit public spaces, engage in volunteering activities, ask questions, engage with like-minded people, maintain eye contact when you speak to others and learn how to start up conversations with strangers; you will notice how you have improved at being more outgoing.
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